The Journey Back to Myself
The Beginning
How it all began to find my authentic self, plus learnt some spiritual gifts along the way. Do you know who you are inside and out? If not, would you like to? I am assuming that if you are on this page, you have experienced some spirituality as well, but know it is not needed to find your true self. I do believe we all have gifts in some way, and you may be surprised if you decide to take this journey yourself.
From the beginning, my spirituality has never been loud, only consistent from a young age. Born and baptized Catholic, never practiced, remained curious about all things as I grew up, plus I was always a little different. Friends with everyone but with no one.
Fast forward to my 20s…
After moving away from my hometown, my intuition started to be known. I had a knowing that I could not explain. Always correct but kept to myself. I could guess the ending of a movie, read people, or any situation. This wasn’t from ego; it was a feeling deep within. It happened gradually but developed as I grew. To express what I was feeling, I would do it in a roundabout way, or I would be accused of being a know-it-all. People did not relate to me, but I had a gift of being relatable.
The discovery of the Chakras appeared in this time frame, as well, as a big milestone in marriage. I was married in my 20s, but it never felt quite right, so I was always trying to figure out why. I reached for anything spiritual. I had to be ‘me’, if you sense the sarcasm. As life progressed, my love of Chakras, crystals, the moon…rocks..always rocks, grew. My mindset evolved. The era of children started from 28 into my 30s. Ending with 3 daughters and losing a son at 21 weeks.
Deep Dive Inward
Divorce ended my marriage at 40, which nudged me into my spirituality. With a blink of turmoil through my 40s, I then was into my 50’s. Looking back, the only time to look back is to see where you were and where you are now. I saw that the last half of my life was to learn a whole lot of lessons. What really jumped out was how I grew as a person and how my spiritual gifts bloomed alongside me. It’s true what they say, ‘The first part of your life is living and learning, and the second part is unlearning what you learnt in the first part.’ I see now that all my hardships helped me grow authentically. I always say, it’s a lesson or a blessing, and sometimes the lesson turns into a blessing.’
My Authenticity Arrived
The authentic me was being in tune with my spirituality. As I grew, my gifts grew. My intuition was getting fine-tuned. Everyone can experience this if you do your inner work. Try it at home. Every time you have a twinge of knowing, in your tummy or wherever you may feel it, trust it. Go with it. The outcome is usually successful. Listening to your inner knowing is hard, repetitive work. We are told in society to ignore our 6th senses. I worked on this daily for years.
This intuition is what led me to accept the ending of my 20yr marriage. The universe spoke, and I finally listened. You know how, when you are given chances for a change, but you ignore that gut feeling repeatedly, then the universe roars; well, she roared, LOUDLY. My divorce was the slap from the universe that I ignored. My divorce was devastatingly abusive.
The Shell I Grew From
In hindsight, this was one of many blessings. It was when I hit rock bottom due to mental, emotional and financial abuse. I had nowhere to go but to rise. My spirituality came to be my focus. I had to go inward and dig deep into my shadows. What I was ready for showed up.
To give you a brief picture, I was a mess, an abused woman of a narcissistic ex-husband. I was a shell of a woman. My ‘why’ to survive was my 3 daughters, who needed their mom. As days went by, I grew closer to myself, matured, and everything shifted. Your senses become alive. Your identity crashes, but the real, non-materialistic life and inner growth become attractive!
I embraced my gifts with grace. My intuition guided me; numerology is my religion, and there is always a sign if you look up. Synchronicities everywhere. I have discovered I own a few Clairsenses. This deep soul journey of mine has been rewarding. If you would care to read further, I have added a reference for the clairsenses. Check it out, you may resonate.
http://glowithin.ca/post/exploring-the-clair-senses-and-types-of-clairvoyance
Quick overview: my healing went like this. Counselling until she could no longer assist...I needed more. Crystals were always with me. Energy was always a thing. Then it was Access Consciousness Bars (2018), Life coaching(2019), The Emotion Code (2020), Trauma-Informed Yoga(500hr-2021), Reiki Master(2021/23), and Hypnotherapy(SWIHA 2022). I experienced it, then became a practitioner of it to help others. Alchemy!
All Masks Off
Growth is messy, scary and never linear, but worth it. The result is becoming unapologetically authentically you. Embracing, for the first time, who I truly was. My divorce was a gift. Everyone’s journey is unique to them.
From my own experience, What I know for sureis this: Life is about choices, you learn to stay on. your own lane, you set boundries, you learn self-compassion, you calm your nervous system, you build resilience, you get picky who you share your energy with, your real tribe shows up, maskes come off, you learn to love me, myself, and I and are willing to be your best friend, you see who is toxic, you vibrate at a higher frequency, and you become emotionally intelligent.
Learning who you are is a gift. Living it is the blessing!
❤️anna
Disclaimer: This is a personal web blog; the opinions expressed there represent my own expression. I make no representation as to the accuracy or completeness of any information on this site. The owner of Earthy Mind & Soul will not be liable for any errors or omissions in this information. The owner will not be liable for any losses, injuries or damages from the display or use of this information.
